Narcissist* Traits – Don’t Rely On Their Inflated, False Claims

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Proverbs 25:14 – Like clouds and wind without rain Is a man who boasts of his gifts falsely.
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 “Clouds and wind without rain” may not mean much to today’s urbanites – its a word picture from an agrian time.  But to a farmer looking for the crucial rain needed for a successful crop, clouds and wind are signs that the necessary rain should be coming soon.  Then, if does not come, the farmer is let down that the promise of rain did not result in actual rain.
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This paints a picture of the folly of relying on a narcissist’s false boasting.  (See below* for how we know this describes a narcissist).  The “gifts” mentioned in Proverbs 25:14 refers to something the boaster is promising to bring – it could be a physical gift, or possibly even the application of his time, energy, and talent to a particular need.    In boasting falsely, the narcissist is promising something he will not deliver – either in the gift being “less” than he is advertising, or by not following through at all.   While he is boasting about the gift he will bring, he either knows he can’t deliver and is lying, or he thinks he is able to deliver when he actually can’t (and is delusional about the gap between what he is promising and its “lesser” reality).

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In a narcissist’s never ending quest to exalt himself, he is highly likely to overstate his ability to deliver what he is promising.  So, if you rely on his boasting, you could likely wind up like the farmer that does not receive the rain he is looking for.

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This is also referred to in Psalm 40.  You will be blessed if you do not rely on narcissists / those with insolent pride for help.

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Psalm 40:4 – How blessed is the man who has made the Lord his trust, And has not turned to the proud, nor to those who lapse into falsehood.

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* How do we know that we can apply this Proverb to our dealing with narcissists (those with insolent pride, see here)?  While not everyone who boasts has insolent pride (aka narcissism, see here), those with insolent pride typically boast in order to exalt themselves or be the center of attention (see here), and tend to speak falsely due to self-delusion or manipulation (see here and here).  Therefore, while this Proverb may not necessarily help us to identify a narcissist, it will help us to avoid relying on those we have already identified to be narcissists.

One response

  1. Pingback: Is Narcissism* On The Increase? « Biblical Perspectives On Narcissism

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