“The People Of The Lie”

.

John 9:39-41

39 And Jesus said, “For judgment I came into this world, so that those who do not see may see, and that those who see may become blind.” 40 Those of the Pharisees who were with Him heard these things and said to Him, “We are not blind too, are we?” 41 Jesus said to them, “If you were blind, you would have no sin; but since you say, ‘We see,’ your sin remains.

.

One of the primary traits of the narcissistic Pharisees was their attitude of moral superiority and refusal to acknowledge that they had any sin – even though their inward lives were full of sin.  In this they deceived and lied to both themselves and others.  This can also be seen in Luke 18:9-14, Matthew 23:25-28, and Matthew 9:10-13.

.

M Scott Peck was a psychiatrist whose personal journey ultimately led him to commit to Christianity.  By observation and analysis, through the lens of Christianity, he reached the same conclusion that Jesus had already made clear above.

Following are excerpts from a book he wrote on the subject

. Continue reading

Best Match Between Secular and Biblical Definitions of Narcissism

By Mayo Clinic Staff

 .

Narcissistic personality disorder is a mental disorder in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for admiration and a lack of empathy for others. But behind this mask of ultra confidence lies a fragile self-esteem that’s vulnerable to the slightest criticism.

A narcissistic personality disorder causes problems in many areas of life, such as relationships, work, school or financial affairs. You may be generally unhappy and disappointed when you’re not given the special favors or admiration you believe you deserve. Others may not enjoy being around you, and you may find your relationships unfulfilling.

.

The phrase above “inflated sense of their own importance” is the key linkage between the secular and Biblical definitions.  It has echoes of

.

Romans 12:3, 16

For through the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has allotted to each a measure of faith……. 16 Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but[n]associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation.

.

“Inflated sense of own importance (Mayo) is approximately = “haughty in mind” (Romans 12:16) = “insolent pride” (Proverbs 21:24).  Therefore, Mayo’s definition (of narcissism) is approximately equal to the Biblical term (insolent pride).

 

Is Narcissism = Insolent Pride in the Bible?

.

.

As we have mentioned previously, one underlying premise of this blog is that what is defined as “narcissism” in the secular world of psychology is called “insolent pride” in the Bible.   The basis for making this assertion is the substantial, but not necessarily  1:1, overlap of traits.

 

TheBibleOnNarcissists

 

As Narcissistic Personality Disorder is still being researched in the formal field of psychology, and is only generally defined in the world of pop psychology, it does not have a clear, official definition  (see here).   Therefore, it stands to reason that there won’t be a clear 1;1 match between the terms “narcissism” and “insolent pride”, when one of the terms is not precisely defined.   But, there is enough overlap of traits that we can use the term “narcissism” as an approximation for “insolent pride”.

.

The reason we are even using the term “narcissism” is that many people who are searching for answers on how to deal with these troublesome people will likely search using the term “narcissism”, as that is the term with which they are most familiar.  But the most precise and real answers will come from the Biblical understanding of “insolent pride”.  That is why we are using the terms synonymously, even though there is not a precise match-up between terms.

 

 

 

The Divergence of Secular and Biblical Approaches To Narcissism*

.

When we are discussing traits and tactics of narcissists*, there is not much difference between secular and biblical perspectives.  This is because narcissist traits and tactics are basically observational and/or descriptive – focused on “facts”.   The secular world “observes” the traits and tactics of narcissists* (those with insolent pride), while the Bible “describes” them.

.

But it is as we dig deeper that the secular and biblical perspectives on narcissism will diverge.  This is because the biblical perspective brings God into the equation (of course), while the secular perspective does not.  Bringing God into the picture will affect our understanding of why narcissists do what they do, how they became narcissists, how we should relate to and deal with them, and how God deals with them.  Bringing God into the picture will also impact our understanding of whether things in our “relationships” with narcissists can ever change or improve.

.

We will try to explain as we progress both how and why bringing God into the picture changes things.  And we will also occasionally highlight the differences between the secular and biblical approaches.

.

I am mentioning this now, because while we will continue to discuss traits and tactics of narcissists, the emphasis is going to shift over time to a much deeper search into what is really going on with these “difficult people”.

.

.

* Narcissist/narcissism is the modern colloquial term for what the Bible calls “insolent pride”.  Please see here for an explanation.

Narcissist Traits – They Will Trash You If You Reprove Them

As mentioned earlier, “scoffer” is one name to describe narcissists who act with “insolent pride”.  Therefore, we can learn more about the characteristics of a narcissist by seeing what the Bible says about scoffers.


This comparison list focuses on the narcissistic characteristic of absolutely hating to be told they are wrong in any way, shape, or form.

 

Level

Scoffer (Insolent Pride) Trait

Narcissism Trait

1

Proverbs 15:2 – A scoffer does not love one who reproves him, he will not go to the wise

A narcissist will first avoid situations where he may be told he is doing something wrong…..no matter how wise the “reprover” might be

2

Proverbs 13:1 – “…A scoffer does not listen to rebuke”

But if a narcissist somehow does find himself in position of being rebuked, he will refuse to listen.  Have you ever tried to rebuke a narcissist?  He will ignore you, verbally fight you, tell you why you are the one who is wrong – anything to keep from admitting that they may be wrong.

3

Proverbs 9:8 – “Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you..”

Proverbs 26:24-26 – “He who hates disguise it with his lips, but he lays up deceit in his heart.  When he speaks graciously, do not believe him, for there are seven abominations in his heart.  Though his hatred covers itself with guile, his wickedness will be revealed before the assembly.”

Not only will a narcissist refuse to listen, but he will also hate you for reproving him.

He will disguise his hatred, and even speak graciously to you, but when he has the chance to trash you publicly he will take it.

4

Proverbs 9:7 – “He who corrects a scoffer gets dishonor for himself…”

This results in a narcissist trashing your reputation – a narcissist will not hesitate to trash the reputation of those who try to correct them – resulting in dishonor to you for daring to correct them.

So, if it’s not a good idea to rebuke a narcissist, what do you do?  There are other ways to deal with them…. we’ll be exploring those in future blogs.

Narcissism = Insolent Pride in the Bible

.

Proverbs 21:24

24 “Proud,” “Haughty,” “Scoffer,” are his names,
Who acts with insolent pride.

.

You may have found this blog because you have a “narcissist” in your life, or  in the life of someone you care about.   At first, you may not have known that you were dealing with a narcissist, but the pain and damage this selfish, arrogant, condescending, domineering person caused might have driven you to search for answers on what was going on, and on how to deal with this difficult person.  As you went online or to books on  Amazon, you read more about who this person is, and how he operates.  And you likely read some explanations as to how he got this way, or advice regarding how to deal with this “narcissist”.  In the process of trying to learn everything possible in your search for answers, you may have decided to explore what the Bible has to say on the subject.

.

While the Bible does not specifically refer to “narcissism” –  which takes its name from Greek mythology – it does speak to the subject.

Continue reading

Be Loved, To Love

We Love Because He First Loved Us

Boundlessly Good

God's Motive For All That He Does