Psalm 17 – David’s Prayer For Protection Against Oppressors

July 11, 2018 By Searching4Wisdom in 6 Case Studies, David's Perspective on Narcissism (Psalms) Tags: Psalm 17

Psalm 17

Prayer for Protection against Oppressors.

A Prayer of David.

17 Hear a just cause, O Lord, give heed to my cry;
Give ear to my prayer, which is not from deceitful lips.
²Let my judgment come forth from Your presence;
Let Your eyes look with equity.

³You have tried my heart;
You have visited me by night;
You have tested me and You find nothing;
I have purposed that my mouth will not transgress.
⁴As for the deeds of men, by the word of Your lips
I have kept from the paths of the violent.
⁵My steps have held fast to Your paths.
My feet have not slipped.

⁶I have called upon You, for You will answer me, O God;
Incline Your ear to me, hear my speech.
⁷Wondrously show Your lovingkindness,
O Savior of those who take refuge at Your right hand
From those who rise up against them.
⁸Keep me as the apple of the eye;
Hide me in the shadow of Your wings
⁹From the wicked who despoil me,
My deadly enemies who surround me.

¹⁰They have closed their unfeeling heart,
With their mouth they speak proudly.
¹¹They have now surrounded us in our steps;
They set their eyes to cast us down to the ground.
¹²He is like a lion that is eager to tear,
And as a young lion lurking in hiding places.

¹³Arise, O Lord, confront him, bring him low;
Deliver my soul from the wicked with Your sword,
¹⁴From men with Your hand, O Lord,
From men of the world, whose portion is in this life,
And whose belly You fill with Your treasure;
They are satisfied with children,
And leave their abundance to their babes.
¹⁵As for me, I shall behold Your face in righteousness;
I will be satisfied with Your likeness when I awake.

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Continue reading →

Narcissist* Traits – They Lack Perspective On What’s Important

October 5, 2017 By Searching4Wisdom in 2 Narcissist Traits, The Pharisees Tags: Matthew 23:23-24, Micah 6:8, Proverbs 14:6

Matthew 23:23-24

Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you tithe mint and dill and cummin [see note], and have neglected the weightier provisions of the law: justice and mercy and faithfulness; but these are the things you should have done without neglecting the others. ²⁴You blind guides, who strain out a gnat and swallow a camel!

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Continue reading →

Dealing With N’s – Daniel and Nebuchadnezzar

September 26, 2017 By Searching4Wisdom in 3 Letting God Act, 5 Dealing with Narcissists, 6 Case Studies, Nebuchadnezzar Tags: Daniel

Sorry, I have been travelling, and am just now getting back on track.

I just came across a good read on how Daniel wisely dealt with a big narcissist in his life, Nebuchadnezzar.

Take a look

Dealing With Narcissists* – Healing Their Victims

August 11, 2017 By Searching4Wisdom in 5 Dealing with Narcissists, How Jesus Dealt With Narcissists Tags: John 9:22, John 9:34-38, Matthew 9:10-13

There is much to learn from how Jesus dealt with the narcissists of His day, the Pharisees (see here and here on how we know the Pharisees were narcissists/scoffers filled with insolent pride). It is instructive as to what He did and said in His dealings with them, but also what did not do, and did not say. It is very interesting that in some cases, rather than trying to defend against the narcissists’ actions, He put His focus on ministering to those whom the narcissists “hurt”. Here are a couple of examples: . Continue reading →

Dealing With Narcissists* – Case Study on “Let Them Alone”

July 11, 2017 By Searching4Wisdom in 5 Dealing with Narcissists, How Jesus Dealt With Narcissists, The Pharisees Tags: Matthew 15:1-14

How Jesus handled His encounters with the narcissistic* Pharisees are very instructive. The following encounter is a case in point.

Matthew 15

15 Then some Pharisees and scribes* came to Jesus from Jerusalem and said, ²“Why do Your disciples break the tradition of the elders? For they do not wash their hands when they eat bread.” ³And He answered and said to them, “Why do you yourselves transgress the commandment of God for the sake of your tradition? ⁴For God said, ‘Honor your father and mother,’ and, ‘He who speaks evil of father or mother is to be put to death.’ ⁵But you say, ‘Whoever says to his father or mother, “Whatever I have that would help you has been given to God,” ⁶he is not to honor his father or his mother.’ And by this you invalidated the word of God for the sake of your tradition.⁷You hypocrites, rightly did Isaiah prophesy of you:

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⁸‘This people honors Me with their lips,
But their heart is far away from Me.
⁹‘But in vain do they worship Me,
Teaching as doctrines the precepts of men.’”

Continue reading →

How Can I Heal? Psalm 56

February 2, 2017 By Searching4Wisdom in 2 For "Victims": "How Can I Heal"?, 6 Redemption & Healing, David's Perspective on Narcissism (Psalms) Tags: Psalm 56

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Psalm 56

56 Be gracious to me, O God, for man has trampled upon me;
Fighting all day long he oppresses me.
²My foes have trampled upon me all day long,
For they are many who fight proudly against me.

³When I am afraid,
I will put my trust in You.
⁴In God, whose word I praise, Continue reading →

The Fruit of Weakness – David and Saul

November 13, 2016 By Searching4Wisdom in 3 Letting God Act, 5 Dealing with Narcissists, David's Perspective on Narcissism (Psalms), King Saul

David to Saul (a narcissist) – I Samuel 24:10-12

¹⁰Behold, this day your [Saul’s] eyes have seen that the Lord had given you today into my [David’s] hand in the cave, and some said to kill you, but my eye had pity on you; and I said, ‘I will not stretch out my hand against my lord, for he is the Lord’s anointed.’ ¹¹Now, my father, see! Indeed, see the edge of your robe in my hand! For in that I cut off the edge of your robe and did not kill you, know and perceive that there is no evil or rebellion in my hands, and I have not sinned against you, though you are lying in wait for my life to take it. ¹²May the Lord judge between you and me, and may the Lord avenge me on you; but my hand shall not be against you.

Saul to David – 1 Samuel 24:18-20

¹⁸You have declared today that you have done good to me, that the Lord delivered me into your hand and yet you did not kill me. ¹⁹For if a man finds his enemy, will he let him go away safely? May the Lord therefore reward you with good in return for what you have done to me this day. ²⁰Now, behold, I know that you will surely be king, and that the kingdom of Israel will be established in your hand.

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As we discussed here, purposefully allowing ourselves to be weak, rather than resisting, in the face of an attack from a narcissist, allows God to act and provides a stronger testimony to the narcissist and others.

David was a prime illustration of this in allowing himself to be weak in the face of the narcissistic onslaught from Saul. Even though God had anointed David King, and David had done nothing wrong, and even though he had the strength with his “mighty men” to take Saul head-on, David allowed Saul to chase him, and trusted God to 1. protect him, 2. deliver him from Saul, and 3. establish him as king in God’s time. Even when David had the chance to kill Saul – which would end it all and fulfill by his own hand God’s declaration that he would be king – David chose to let God act and fulfill His word, rather than taking things into His own hands.

David’s testimony spoke volumes to Saul, with Saul admitting to himself and publicly what he probably already knew in his heart, that David would surely become the King. David’s allowing himself to be weak and leave things in God’s hands, ultimately showed God’s strength to the nation of Israel, and was a testimony that Saul could not refute.

And, in the end, God dealt with Saul and David became king.

Additional reading: “Saul Hunts David”

Putting “Biblical Perspectives On Narcissism” Into Perspective

David’s Prayer For God To Shame Those Who Magnify Themselves Over Us

October 16, 2016 By Searching4Wisdom in David's Perspective on Narcissism (Psalms) Tags: Psalm 35

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Psalm 35

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Contend, O Lord, with those who contend with me;
Fight against those who fight against me.
²Take hold of buckler and shield
And rise up for my help.
³Draw also the spear and the battle-axe to meet those who pursue me;
Say to my soul, “I am your salvation.”

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⁴Let those be ashamed and dishonored who seek my life;
Let those be turned back and humiliated who devise evil against me.
Continue reading →

Narcissistic Groups, Cultures, and Nations

October 11, 2016 By Searching4Wisdom in 7 Case Studies in the Bible Tags: Edom, Isaiah 16, Jeremiah 48, Jeremiah 49, Moab, Obadiah

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Just as there can be narcissism / insolent pride within an individual, there can also be entire cultures and nations that have narcissist characteristics.

What is a narcissistic culture? A culture where the preponderence of the people are narcissists and act in narcissistic ways. Or a culture (or nation) where the entire group acts toward other groups with the heart and behavior of a narcissist.

Two such cases in the Bible were the nation of Moab and the nation of Edom. Moab was the nation which came from the incestuous relationship between Lot and his older daughter. Edom was the nation which descended from Esau, Jacob’s twin brother.

Referring to Moab……

Isaiah 16:6

⁶We have heard of the pride of Moab, an excessive pride;
Even of his arrogance, pride, and fury;
His idle boasts are false.

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Jeremiah 48:29-30

²⁹“We have heard of the pride of Moab—he is very proud—
Of his haughtiness, his pride, his arrogance and his self-exaltation.
³⁰“I know his fury,” declares the Lord,
“But it is futile;
His idle boasts have accomplished nothing.

Continue reading →

“HE Stands At The Right Hand of the Needy, To Save Him From Those Who Judge His Soul”

October 6, 2016 By Searching4Wisdom in David's Perspective on Narcissism (Psalms) Tags: Psalm 109

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Psalm 109

O God of my praise,
Do not be silent!

²For they have opened the wicked and deceitful mouth against me;
They have spoken against me with a lying tongue.
³They have alsosurrounded me with words of hatred,
And fought against me without cause.
⁴In return for my love they act as my accusers;
But I am in prayer.
⁵Thus they have repaid me evil for good
And hatred for my love. Continue reading →

Narcissist Case Study – King Saul

September 15, 2016 By Searching4Wisdom in King Saul Tags: Absalom, Esther 8:3, I Samuel 10, I Samuel 13, I Samuel 15, I Samuel 9

It is a pleasure (not to mention less work) when I come across another’s writing which helps add to the understanding I am seeking through this blog. I just came across a good profile of King Saul, called “Saul a Portrait of Pride and Insecurity“, by a writer pen-named Tamarajo.

Please see the entire entry here. Following are some excerpts:

Saul: A Portrait ofPride and Insecurity

“Saul’s whole life is an example of how his low opinion of himself and his lack of Faith in God led him to pride and his own demise. Continue reading →

Narcissist* Traits – They Do Not Think They Are In Need of Help (Pharisee Case Study)

August 16, 2016 By Searching4Wisdom in 2 Narcissist Traits, The Pharisees Tags: John 9, Luke 18, Matthew 23, Proverbs 15:12, Proverbs 28:13

John 9:39-41

³⁹And Jesus said, “For judgment I came into this world, so that those who do not see may see, and that those who see may become blind.” ⁴⁰Those of the Pharisees who were with Him heard these things and said to Him, “We are not blind too, are we?”⁴¹Jesus said to them, “If you were blind, you would have no sin; but since you say, ‘We see,’ your sin remains.

The narcissistic Pharisees were in fact blind, even though they claimed that they could see. They were blind to the true condition of their hearts, thinking themselves to be righteous teachers and spiritual leaders, when in fact their hearts were full of evil thoughts, desires, and motives. Jesus later was very direct in pointing out to the Pharisees their blindness. Continue reading →

Narcissist Tactics – They Mock and Make Excuses (Pharisee Case Study)

August 7, 2016 By Searching4Wisdom in 3 Narcissist Tactics, The Pharisees Tags: Amos 5:10, Luke 16, Proverbs 9:7-8

Luke 16:13-15

¹³No servant can serve two masters; for either he will hate the one and love the other, or else he will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve God and wealth.”

¹⁴Now the Pharisees, who were lovers of money, were listening to all these things and were scoffing at Him. ¹⁵And He said to them, “You are those who justify yourselves in the sight of men, but God knows your hearts; for that which is highly esteemed among men is detestable in the sight of God.

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[Please see here and here for more on how we know the Pharisees were narcissists].

This is one of the clearer examples of how narcissists work. In their hearts, the Pharisees were focused on money and the “finer things of life” that it would bring. But in their pride, they also wanted to be highly thought of by men for their piety (including the all-sufficiency of God). Jesus called out their hypocrisy and created a dilemma for them with His statement that they could not make both God and money number one in their lives – with the clear implication that they had chosen money over God.

The narcissistic Pharisees had two ways of dealing with this.

First was to mock (or scoff at) the One telling them they could not have it both ways. Their intent was to tear down, from a position of “superiority”, and discredit the one getting in way of their greed and pride.

Proverbs 9:7-8

⁷He who corrects a scoffer gets dishonor for himself,
And he who reproves a wicked man gets insults for himself.
⁸Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you,
Reprove a wise man and he will love you.

and

Amos 5:10

¹⁰They hate him who reproves in the gate,
And they abhor him who speaks with integrity.

Second was to make justification (in modern terms – making excuses), or to construct a clever series of reasons, for what they were doing for the purpose of making people around them agree with them and continue to think highly of them.

But Jesus made it clear to them that even though they may get away with fooling men, they were not fooling God. God could clearly see what was in their hearts, and would judge them based on that – and not based on what the Pharisees had gotten men to believe.

They might get short term kudos from men for how wonderful they are, but they would ultimately have to answer to God for the evil in their hearts.

Putting “Biblical Perspectives On Narcissism” Into Perspective

Dealing With Narcissists* – David’s Prayer for Deliverance

June 4, 2016 By Searching4Wisdom in 2 For "Victims": "How Can I Heal"?, 4 Biblical Praying, 5 Dealing with Narcissists, David's Perspective on Narcissism (Psalms) Tags: Psalm 40

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One of the questions frequently searched by people that find this blog is, “how do I pray about this situation with the narcissist in my life?”. This would include, “how to pray for the narcissist”, “how to pray for ourselves in the situation”, and “how to pray for God’s intervention”. We have already mentioned David’s Prayer for Justice, and David’s Prayer for Protection. Here is a prayer from David for deliverance. It is important to understand that effective praying has some requirements – we cannot reject God’s ways on the one hand and at the same time expect Him to “jump through hoops for us” on the other hand.

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Psalm 40:13-17

¹³Be pleased, O Lord, to deliver me;
Make haste, O Lord, to help me.
¹⁴Let those be ashamed and humiliated together
Who seek my life to destroy it;
Let those be turned back and dishonored
Who delight in my hurt.
¹⁵Let those be appalled because of their shame
Who say to me, “Aha, aha!”
¹⁶Let all who seek You rejoice and be glad in You;
Let those who love Your salvation say continually,
“The Lord be magnified!”
¹⁷Since I am afflicted and needy,
Let the Lord be mindful of me.
You are my help and my deliverer;
Do not delay, O my God.