Click here for initial steps to peace with God

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We wrestle through much of our lives, often too busy to think deeply about what is going on.  But, occasionally when we face a uniquely difficult situation we may ask ourselves “why”.  Why did God “allow” this problem?  Why is my life the way it is?  We may look at the bigger picture by asking “why did God design life the way He did?”.   The following is not an exhaustive discussion, but something to consider.

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As you ponder, a key piece is to understand that God has a fundamental plan for a purpose of love, for everyone.

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….. In all wisdom and insight He [God] made known to us the mystery of His will, according to His kind intention which He purposed in Him [Jesus] ……….. who (God) works all things after the counsel of His will, to the end that we who were the first to hope in Christ would be to the praise of His glory.

Ephesians 1:8-12

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Ephesians 1:8-12 explains clearly that God has a plan – for you, me, everyone – for a purpose of love – “the mystery of His will, according to His kind intention”.   This plan is not just spoken of in Ephesians 1.  Isaiah talks about God’s wonderful works, based on His plans formed long ago (i.e. – before Creation), with perfect faithfulness (fully consistent with His nature, including His goodness).

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O Lord, You are my God; I will exalt You, I will give thanks to Your name; For You have worked wonders, plans formed long ago, with perfect faithfulness.

Isaiah 25:1

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To arrive at this plan, God thought through every possibility which could exist (“in all insight” – think trillions X trillions X trillions) and chose the optimal one (“in all wisdom”) which would accomplish His purpose of love.  And He executes everything, down to the tiniest detail, according to the plan which he has created (“works all things after the counsel of His will”).

The essence of God’s nature is love, so any plan consistent with that nature would be a plan formed and executed from His heart of love.

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“God is love” – 1 John 4:8

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The centerpiece of this plan is the ultimate demonstration of His love (“which He purposed in Him [Jesus]”) through the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus to save His enemies from the consequences of their actions.

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For one will hardly die for a righteous man; though perhaps for the good man someone would dare even to die.  But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.

Romans 5:8

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To emphasize again, God – out of His core nature of love and an overflowing desire to express that love – came up with the single best plan that would most fully demonstrate that love.  And that plan would be to die for worthless, far-beneath-Him enemies to save them from what they deserved and to replace that with the highest standing possible as eternal citizens of Heaven.

The end of all of this is that we will praise Him for his manifold excellence (“praise of His glory”) which He has shown in every possible way – and of which we have been made a prime beneficiary.  While God’s plan for a purpose of love is general (“for God so loved the world” – John 3:16), it is also specific to you and specific to me.

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When Peter saw him, he said to Jesus, “Lord, what about this man?” Jesus said to him, “If it is my will that he remain until I come, what is that to you? You follow me!”

John 21:18-22

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When we ask why God is allowing a narcissist to wreak havoc in our lives, we can be confident in our belief that it is not random – there is a much bigger plan in play, and the essence of that plan is love.  The proof of God’s goodness is Jesus’ death on the cross for us.  And God makes it clear that if He was willing to do that, why would He not shower us with other demonstrations of His goodness?

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What then shall we say to these things? If God is for us, who is against us?  He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?   

Romans 8:31-32

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It is impossible for me or anyone else to tell you what God’s plan for a purpose of love is for you.  God is weaving together millions of millions of life circumstances specifically for you.  While the broad themes might be similar, your life and God’s plan for your life is one-of-a-kind.  I have an identical twin brother, and we have a lot in common in our life trajectories – but our lives are not at all the same.  My wife’s life and my life are very different, even though they are lived together.

Why this way?  God’s BIG plan was realized through the singular most important event in history, but the billions x billions of demonstrations and outflowing of that plan through the wide variety of our individual lives further displays God’s glory like additional facets of a diamond.  An 16-sided diamond is good, but a 10,000-sided diamond far more glorious in the light it reflects.

Of course, those who do not believe but reject God and His love have a very different outcome.  They forfeit much of God’s goodness in this present life (they still receive His common goodness given to all mankind), and more importantly experience His wrath reserved for those who reject Him.

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Click here for initial steps to peace with God

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In our previous post we discussed how insolently proud, narcissistic bullies will use a position of power to coerce compliance on the part of others through bullying tactics.  Sadly, until Jesus returns to set everything right, this will be part of the world we must navigate.

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How do we deal with the bullies that inevitably cross our paths?  Here are options we have:

1. Avoid them – bullies may have the upper hand on their turf, but who says we have to stay on their turf and play their game?
2. Try a power play – sometimes we’re in a position to “fight back”
3. Get our “big brother” – sometimes we can recruit someone stronger (the image of bringing your big brother to the playground) to defend us

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I had a friend tell me the story of his children bullied on the school bus on the way to school.  One morning he got on the bus and told the bullies “This is going to end.  The only question is how much pain you are going to take before you stop, because I will do whatever it takes until you stop”.  In the face of what the bullies knew was an unwinnable battle, they stopped their bullying.

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What if none of the above three options are available to us?  We can take a bigger view of the situation and invite God to be our defender and protector.

Continue reading →

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This blog started as a result of a situation with a narcissist which led me to cry to God for “Help!”  God’s process of answering that prayer began with leading me first to the secular definition, traits, and tactics.  I thought, THIS is what I’m dealing with.  After that I thought, “surely God says something about it”, and the research for this blog commenced.

The secular world does a good job of observing and describing narcissistic traits – as those are readily apparent to everyone to see.  The difference between the secular and Biblical perspectives lie in 1.  what is the cause, 2.  what are possible solutions, and 3.  how do you deal Biblically with them?

In some cases, the right answer is to “avoid” them (where this applies is discussed in the post Dealing With Narcissists – It Depends on the Relationship).

This is particularly appropriate in dating relationships.  We have a friend who was recently badly hurt dating a narcissist.  This friend constantly felt bad, and did not know why.  I just shared with him an article I found @ https://www.healthline.com/health/mental-health/am-i-dating-a-narcissist.

Here are some highlights

11 Signs You’re Dating a Narcissist

Continue reading →

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I came across something so compelling I just had to share.

I saw a small fraction of the Olympics, including the women’s 400 meter hurdles won in world record time by Sydney Maclaughlin.  I then heard that she was a believer in Jesus, and came across this quote from her Instagram page:

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“Let me start off by saying, what and honor it is to be able to represent not only my country, but also the kingdom of God. What I have in Christ is far greater than what I have or don’t have in life.

I pray my journey may be a clear depiction of submission and obedience to God. Even when it doesn’t make sense, even when it doesn’t seem possible. He will make a way out of no way. Not for my own gratification, but for His glory. I have never seen God fail in my life. In anyone’s life for that matter. Just because I may not win every race, or receive every one of my heart’s desires, does not mean God had failed. His will is PERFECT.

And He has prepared me for a moment such as this. That I may use the gifts He has given me to point all the attention back to Him. “

(https://www.instagram.com/p/CSMa9_mrhQU/)

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YES !!!

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God knew Sydney’s heart and her testimony – including her willingness to genuinely give God the glory – and provided her a platform so that HE would be made known to a much broader audience.

The narcissistic approach is to exalt ourselves first, with God possibly benefitting from OUR reflected glory as a secondary consideration.

But the non-narcissistic, humble approach is to “go low” in our hearts, seek to honor God first, and then let Him decide how He wants to use it – whether very visibly like Sydney Mclaughlin, or invisibly in a way that will only be revealed in eternity.

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Click here for initial steps on how to know God personally

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Are we there yet?

A friend recently surprised me at lunch by saying that many of his friends actively discussed the approaching return of Christ.  I thought I was alone in feeling that we’re getting close.  Could we actually be at the end?

How are we to know?  Which of the rapture positions are correct – pre-trib, post-trib, or pan-trib (it will all pan out in the end)?  And how do we prepare for what’s coming our way?

Until now we had the luxury to debate what the Scripture says, but at the actual end that debate crashes into reality.   When we are close to God’s destination our views will have real-world implications on how we proceed, and how to prepare.

God has provided “trip instructions” on the road to the end.  And He has provided a key signpost which will tell us which set of instructions are correct.  We are announcing a new book outlining those signposts, especially the one which will tell us that it really is “time to prepare”.

click for link to Amazon Books

As the title says, Time To Prepare:  Signposts On The Road To The End outlines

• the Biblical signposts on the road to the end
• the key signpost that will tell us which side of “the debate” is actually true
• practical Biblical advice for what’s coming our way

The clear Biblical perspective in these pages will give you a solid base, and hope, for what looks to be a bumpy ride ahead.

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Most of you have heard the phrase “actions speak louder than words”.  This well-worn phrase from the past, like many others, actually has a Biblical foundation.  Consider these for example,

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By this we know that we have come to know Him, if we keep His commandments. The one who says, “I have come to know Him,” and does not keep His commandments, is a liar, and the truth is not in him;    I John 2:3-4

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John’s point is that the proof of your what’s in your heart is in what you do, not in what you say.  If you say something and do the opposite, it is what you do that counts.

Titus said the same thing;

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They profess to know God, but they deny him by their works. They are detestable, disobedient, unfit for any good work.     Titus 1:16

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As did James

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What good is it, my brothers, if someone says he has faith but does not have works? Can that faith save him?   James 2:14-16

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No matter what they may claim, a narcissist’s functional (actual) philosophy is just the opposite.  They believe that what they claim is what really counts.

David accurately described them in Psalm 12

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They speak falsehood to one another;
With flattering lips and with a double heart they speak.
May the Lord cut off all flattering lips,
The tongue that speaks great things;
Who have said, “With our tongue we will prevail;
Our lips are our own; who is lord over us?”   Psalm 12:2-4

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Narcissists believe that they can achieve what they want through words, even if those words have no underlying substance.

A narcissist may get away with this “all talk, no action” approach for awhile, but it will catch up with them at some point.  They may fool some people for awhile, or jump from person to person to avoid being found out, but as always God has the last say in everything.

He sees their act, knows the lack of substance, and makes the final judgment based on actions, not words.

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“Not everyone who says to me, ‘Lord, Lord,’ will enter the kingdom of heaven, but the one who does the will of my Father who is in heaven.     Matthew 7:21-23

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Click here for initial steps on how to know God personally

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Habakkuk 2:4-5

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As the ultimate narcissist, this very much applies to Satan.  Satan’s goal is to gather to himself all nations, and collect to himself all people – to himself and away from God – even though Satan knows full well that those people will be utterly destroyed as a result.   (See here for the first step in not falling into Satan’s trap)

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Click here for a short discussion of the first steps to know God personally

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• Narcissism is the modern colloquial term for what the Bible calls “insolent pride” – see here

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Davidson Trust Publishing is announcing the following books:

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“Lot’s Choice” – just released in print and on Kindle.

“Lot’s Choice” is a short book triggered by a discussion our church home group had a few months ago on the chapter “He Hesitated” from JC Ryle’s book  “Holiness”.  “Lot’s Choice” discusses the essential criteria for making decisions good for our lives, while avoiding the unforeseen outcomes of trying to have it both ways.  It is a straightforward case study – easily used for personal Bible study or for group discussions from youth to adults.

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In the works are two additional books.

• “Do Not Worry About Tomorrow:  A Biblical Perspective On God’s Provision”
  • Release date – February 28, 2020

• “Signposts:  On The Road To The End of History”  (working title)
  •  Expected release date – June 2020
  • A book that outlines
    • the prophetic signposts we are currently witnessing,
    • what they mean
    • how to prepare for what is to come