How Jesus Dealt With Narcissists

May 21, 2025 By in Biblical Perspectives On Narcissism

(Updated and Expanded)

Jesus dealt with narcissists often. He didn’t use the word “narcissist,” of course. He used clearer ones—hypocrite, blind guide, whitewashed tomb, fool. But He knew what kind of people He was dealing with.

He didn’t try to counsel them into humility. He didn’t enter long, therapeutic conversations. He didn’t chase after them to win them back. He exposed them. He rebuked them. And then He walked away.

If you’re dealing with narcissists in your own life, Jesus gives you a model.

1. He Recognized Their Pride and Called It What It Was

Jesus didn’t flinch from naming what He saw. He told the Pharisees:

“You are those who justify yourselves in the sight of men, but God knows your hearts; for that which is highly esteemed among men is detestable in the sight of God.”
— Luke 16:15

They looked spiritual, but they were driven by image. They sat in the best seats and prayed long prayers—not because they loved God, but because they loved how they looked.

Jesus saw through it. And He called it detestable.

2. He Confronted Them Directly—Not Indefinitely

Jesus didn’t stay quiet. He confronted the narcissistic leaders of His day again and again—with precision and clarity.

“Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you clean the outside of the cup and of the dish, but inside they are full of robbery and self-indulgence.”
— Matthew 23:25

But He didn’t spend His whole ministry on them. He confronted them. Then He turned back to those who would listen.

He didn’t cast pearls before swine (Matthew 7:6). He exposed the proud—but He didn’t entrust Himself to them.

3. He Walked Away from the Unrepentant

In John 8, after confronting the Pharisees with truth, He eventually left the temple. In Luke 23, when Herod tried to bait Him, Jesus answered him nothing.

There comes a time to stop talking.

Jesus modeled a boundary not rooted in bitterness, but in discernment. He wasn’t afraid of conflict—but He never let narcissists dictate the terms.

4. He Focused on the Willing, Not the Proud

Jesus didn’t waste His ministry trying to change hardened hearts. He said:

“It is not those who are healthy who need a physician, but those who are sick; I did not come to call the righteous, but sinners.”
— Mark 2:17

Narcissists don’t believe they’re sick. So Jesus spent His time with the broken, the humble, the receptive.

He still does.

Takeaway: You Don’t Have to Fix the Narcissist

If you’re exhausted from trying to win over the narcissist in your life—stop. Follow Jesus’ example.

  • See them for who they are

  • Speak truth when needed

  • Don’t get caught in endless arguments

  • Let go and walk away when the Spirit leads

  • Focus on the ones God has actually called you to love and serve

Jesus never begged narcissists to understand Him. And you don’t need to either.

Share