Narcissists Are Delusional

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Narcissists frequently appear delusional to normal people.  Their delusion shows up in many ways, including a warped and inflated view of accomplishments, and dreaming up grandiose plans that will somehow magically happen.  N’s believe they deserve accolades for their grand plans (rather than true results) – common phrases like “delusions of grandeur” or “legends in their own minds” fits these people.

Haman, a Biblical case study on narcissism in the Old Testament, was a prime example

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Then Haman recounted to them the glory of his riches, and the number of his sons, and every instance where the king had magnified him and how he had promoted him above the princes and servants of the king.  Haman also said, “Even Esther the queen let no one but me come with the king to the banquet which she had prepared; and tomorrow also I am invited by her with the king.      Esther 5:11-12

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Haman automatically assumed that his invitation from Esther was due to his greatness, with no clue that Esther was actually trying to counter the wicked plan he had put into motion.

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Jesus highlighted another example of delusion, when he admonished the “hypocrites” to not attempt to take a speck out of their brother’s eye while they had a log in their own.

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“Do not judge so that you will not be judged.  For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you.  Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye?  Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye?  You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.     Matthew 7:1-5

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These “helpful” (but actually judgmental) narcissists (see here, here, and here) are delusional in two ways.  First, they do not believe that they have a log in their own eye.  Second, they believe they’re qualified to take the speck out of their brother’s eye.  Their insolent pride, and hypocrisy, blinds them to both.

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In both of the above instances, the narcissist’s delusion is in direct contrast to God’s intention for us to have a sound and true view of ourselves.

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For through the grace given to me I say to everyone among you not to think more highly of himself than he ought to think; but to think so as to have sound judgment, as God has allotted to each a measure of faith.      Romans 12:3
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While narcissists in delusion can think more highly of themselves than they ought to think, be sound-minded and see them for what they really are.

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Please see here for the starting point for peace with God.  

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Hypocrisy & Judgmentalism – Two Unmistakable Marks Of Narcissism – Part 2

Please see here for part 1

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Jesus further highlighted the link between hypocrisy and judging others in Matthew 7:1-5:

 “Do not judge so that you will not be judged. 2 For in the way you judge, you will be judged; and by your standard of measure, it will be measured to you. 3 Why do you look at the speck that is in your brother’s eye, but do not notice the log that is in your own eye? 4 Or how can you say to your brother, ‘Let me take the speck out of your eye,’ and behold, the log is in your own eye?

You hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother’s eye.  Matthew 7:1-5

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The word “judge” in Matthew 7:1 has the same root “krino”[1] as in the word hypocrite.  The hypocrite has a “log in his eye” – a euphemism for a “big problem” or “big character flaw”.  But, out of pride the hypocrite minimizes his own log to be “nothing” – saying to himself “I’m OK”.  He then pretends helpfulness by offering to take the speck (a little problem) out of his brother’s eye, but in fact is acting as a proud judge, setting himself up as superior.

His judgment is proof that he has a problem in the same life area in which he is trying to “help” his brother.

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Therefore you have no excuse, everyone of you who passes judgment, for in that which you judge[2] another, you condemn yourself; for you who judge practice the same things.  Romans 2:1

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A Biblical Perspective on “Narcissistic Projection”

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Those who have dealt with narcissists* most likely have experienced a situation where the narcissist accused you of a negative character trait or action, while at the same time they were far more guilty of the very same trait.  Yes, there may have been a speck of truth in what they said, as none of us are perfect and “we all stumble in many ways“.   But you may have been dumbfounded that someone who had the same issue in multiples would feel justified in attacking you for your little speck.

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Secular literature in the field of psychology has termed this behavior “projection”. Continue reading

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