“How Can I Change”? – Introduction

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The secular literature generally states that narcissists* don’t change.  And it is true that narcissists’ pride is a big hindrance to their actually changing.  The following Proverbs discuss how much a narcissist resists being told he might be wrong.  (See here on how narcissism is “insolent pride” in the Bible, and here for a discussion on how “scoffer” is one of the biblical terms for narcissist*)

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Proverbs 9:7 – He who corrects a scoffer gets dishonor for himself, And he who reproves a wicked man gets insults for himself.  Do not reprove a scoffer, or he will hate you, Reprove a wise man and he will love you.
 
Proverbs 13:1 – A wise son accepts his father’s discipline, But a scoffer does not listen to rebuke.
 
Proverbs 14:6 – A scoffer seeks wisdom and finds none, But knowledge is easy to one who has understanding.
 
Proverbs 15:12 – A scoffer does not love one who reproves him, He will not go to the wise.
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On the other hand the Bible says
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Luke 1:37 – For nothing will be impossible with God.”
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and
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Daniel 4:37 – He is able to humble those who walk in pride.”

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Therefore, even though it might be rare and difficult, it is not impossible (and therefore possible) for narcissists to change to a level of greater humility.  (Of course, none of us is ever completely humble).

In fact, God warns narcissists (scoffers) to give up their narcissism (scoffing).  So it is not just that narcissists can change, they are instructed by God to change.

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Isaiah 28:22 – And now do not carry on as scoffers, Or your fetters will be made stronger;

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Proverbs 1:22 – “How long, O naive ones, will you love being simple-minded? And scoffers delight themselves in scoffing, And fools hate knowledge?

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 There are significant consequences to being a narcissist* (see Proverbs 19:29).  But to those who are willing, change is possible.   We will begin to walk down the road of what the Bible says about what it takes for a narcissist / one with insolent pride to truly change.

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