One simple but easy-to-forget thing about narcissists is that, unlike normal people, they don’t mind conflict. They enjoy it. Conflict makes normal people uncomfortable. We try to minimize it in our dealings with others. Oddly, we love it in fiction (Conflict is the gunpowder of fiction, and it’s near relative – controversy – is the gunpowder of journalism. Maintaining constant conflict is the secret to storytelling success). But note that this is “safe” conflict. In real life we hate what we love to see characters go through in fiction. Narcissists have a whole different attitude toward conflict. They use it strategically to manipulate. They seek conflict. They become impossible people, flying into conflict with you over anything you think, say, do, feel, or wear. As if THEY have the right to determine what you say, think, do, feel, or wear.