Dealing With Narcissists* – David’s Prayer for Protection

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As with all other Bible topics, the Biblical perspective on narcissism (aka insolent pride) is interwoven throughout the Bible.   Therefore, the full picture is obtained through stitching together many pieces from many places in the Bible.  Searching this out in blog form has the disadvantage of being worked through in “real time” and therefore pretty raw and disjointed, but it has the big advantage of being able to link back to other blog entries as part of the process of weaving things together and providing better explanations.

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Proverbs can be considered more the wisdom of God (see here), and Psalms more the heart of God (see here).  To not interrupt the flow of this Psalm while still providing details that help to further understand narcissism, I have embedded links in key words, and provided notes.  So please click on the BOLD words and refer to the notes below for additional discussion on a particular insight related to narcissism.

 

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Psalm 5 

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David cries to God for protection from the wicked (narcissists, note 1 below)……..

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Give ear to my words, O Lord,.
Consider my groaning. (Note 2)
Heed the sound of my cry for help, my King and my God,
For to You I pray.
In the morning, O Lord, You will hear my voice;
In the morning I will order my prayer to You and eagerly watch. (Note 3)

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David understood clearly that God hates the narcissist and will ultimately judge him

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For You are not a God who takes pleasure in wickedness;
No evil dwells with You.
The boastful shall not stand before Your eyes;  (Note 4)
You hate all who do iniquity.
You destroy those who speak falsehood*;
The Lord abhors the man of bloodshed and deceit.

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David also understood that as part of the process of dealing with the narcissist, he needed to seek God and allow God to lead him in a path of righteousness (doing what was right, even when his narcissist tormentor was doing what was wrong).

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But as for me, by Your abundant lovingkindness I will enter Your house,
[At Your holy temple I will bow in reverence for You.

O Lord, lead me in Your righteousness because of my foes;
Make Your way straight before me.

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David also had a very clear understanding of who these narcissists were and how they operated

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There is nothing reliable in what they say;
Their inward part is destruction itself.
Their throat is an open grave;
They flatter with their tongue.

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And David was confident enough in God’s hatred of the narcissists, to boldly ask Him to judge them.  (Note 5)

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10 Hold them guilty, O God;
By their own devices let them fall!
In the multitude of their transgressions thrust them out,
For they are rebellious against You.

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Finally, David knew that those who take shelter “in God” will be blessed, and that blessing in turn will be a shield
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11 But let all who take refuge in You be glad,
Let them ever sing for joy;
And may You shelter them,
That those who love Your name may exult in You.
12 For it is You who blesses the righteous man, O Lord,
You surround him with favor as with a shield. (Note 6)

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Notes:

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  1. Narcissism is the modern colloquial term for what the Bible call “insolent pride” – see here
  2. Dealing with narcissists makes us groan.  Its a constant drain on our very souls.
  3. David was praying and “watching for” the answer from the Lord because, ultimately, our answer (as in all answers), must come from Him.  It might be in the form of additional wisdom, additional grace to endure, or in God actively intervening.
  4. Typically, there is a key word that tips us off to scriptures about narcissism – “Boastful” is one of those key words in Psalm 5
  5. David did not judge or exact retribution himself, but asked God to do it  (see here)
  6. God’s favor on us, is a shield against the narcissist.  In some cases, it is appropriate to avoid narcissists (see here).  But in other cases we cannot avoid them, and need to have a shield against the arrows they shoot at us.

4 responses

  1. A key trait of a narcissist is someone who wants to join everything they can to make themselves look good. These are people who will want to rise to the top of an agency who works with abused animals or will join things like “Town Councils.” “Mounted Patrol Chapters” or make charitable contributions to Catholic charities so they can “look good” to others. Meanwhile, behind closed doors, these are lazy and vengeful people. People who try to pit their own children against each other. Who lie to everyone. Who constantly play victim when exposed with their lies or and after they neglect, abuse or/and hurt others.

    Take not that usually very wealthy people are the worst narcissists because they use their money, connection and powerful connections as a mask of sanity. Do not be fooled by them.

    They often use their money to lure vulnerable people in.

    For example, if a child or grandchild is struggling with paying for college, they will offer to pay, even going as far as to sign a “co lease” to an apartment and “fund” their food and set a bank account. Be forewarned! The narcissist will for sure always keep you guessing as to when they will give you the money or funds they PROMISED to give you. It’s their way of keeping you on their fishing hook. They want you to crawl and beg for it. They are sick evil people.

    All the help and aid they give… it’s never to really help the child or grandchild or anyone they promised or said they’d help, it’s to keep these people under their sadistic wing, to use and abuse them for their narcissistic pleasure.

    Truly a sick sadistic person these narcissistic people are. Right from the pit of HELL. But, take heart: God is monitoring their every move. They will not go unpunished for their evil deeds!.

    Another thing a classic narcissist person does is play dumb and act “surprised” when you tell them the truth about what they do or what they said. They will act dumbfounded and offended even when there is clear evidence of what they did or do.

    A narcissistic is a master manipulator, but can’t stand when someone is onto them. That’s why the classic narcissist ALWAYS surrounds themselves with vulnerable, low level thinking people. They like people who have problems or who have been in trouble with the law, so they can manipulate and intimidate them into doing what they need done. All along the narcisstic person secretly HATES and despises the weak people around them that will allow them to manipulate them. That’s how nuts these people are. RUN. Get away from them. May God destroy these evil people if they refuse to be saved. May God absolutely destroy them and stop them from doing more harm.

  2. This is great to know!! I am divorced from a narcopath who married his younger employee that he had an affair w while we were married and she was married at the time too. She is now pregnant and he bought her an even bigger house than he did me. My twin boys are 11yrs old and I pray, pray and keep praying that they won’t turn out with this horrific disorder and will one day see their dad and grandfather for who they truly are. Only the truth will set them free. I sometime feel the need to sabotage their life, but deep down know that in due time he will treat her as he did me. I lost my self esteem, self confidence, walked in eggshells and experience many panic attacks. I am now free to be meeeee and continue to heal on a daily basis. It’s in Gods hands now and I had to turn it ALL over to Him!!! In His time and His will, not mine. I chose to find My relationship w Jesus and not make earthly sections to race ahead of God. I am learning to stop worrying about anything and pray about everything!!! Blessing to all survivors and remember God will come through for us in His time🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻stay
    Strong!!

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